Thursday, June 18, 2015

American Cops vs American Soldiers

   If you are a normal American - like myself - when you see an American serviceman in full get kind of excited! You want to admire him, you want to express some sort of gratitude or maybe even a benign sort of envy. You feel more safe all of a sudden, you want to interact with him, say hi, wave a cordial wave, maybe even buy him the candy he's purchasing if he's in line ahead of you at the AM-PM in Adelanato out in the fucking desert somewhere.
   You get a different reaction when encountering a police officer in a liquor store. You seize up. You gulp. You wonder if you did anything wrong. You think about your vehicle outside. Is it parked correctly? Does it have license plates on it? Do I have a gun in the car? What if he wants to search it? What if he talks to me and decides I'm nervous? Which I am. Will he ask if he can search the car? What if he finds the forbidden remnants of a marijuana leaf? What if I don't have my registration? what if I don't have my driver's license??!! Holy fucking shit!!!  I WILL GO TO JAIL!!!!!
   Yes. Yes indeed. Totally different reaction there, ey, Jasper? You betcha. Unlike the American soldier whose job is to protect you, the American cop's job is to fuck you up, baby, and fuck you up hard and deep and very often with blood spurtage, boy howdy, pilgrim.
   When you see that American soldier you think to yourself "Damn, that bastard is going to fucking die to keep me alive if he has to. Holy fucking shit, I love that son of a bitch!" When you see that American cop you want to fucking flee the area because you have just spotted the enemy and there are no American soldiers around to protect you from him, and if he takes a mind to he is going to ruin the rest of your life for you in a moment's notice. No American citizen has ever had that kind of negative reaction from seeing an American soldier. Every American citizen has had that kind of reaction when from seeing an American cop.
   Apparently no American other than me has ever noticed this -  let's call it - disparity. Apparently I am the only American to notice that something here is not quite right. In fact something here is batshit fucking crazy.
   The thing about "culture" is that it cannot be deprogrammed out of a person. And American culture has as one of its foundational meaningless anchors "the police are necessary for order among the citizenry." Americans are convinced for some reason that without the police all Americans would go on a looting and killing spree; why not let just the cops loot and kill in a slower and more methodical manner?
   Apparently looting and killing is already in the cards somehow, so if we are going to have it let's give that job to the police. They are more low-energy and probably will not start fires in the process.
   This is apparently the thinking on why we have police.
   The American conviction is that the police are what make everything else of a non-violent nature possible. The police ensure progress and prosperity, is the belief of the culture. Since the police in fact impede progress and reduce prosperity - yours - every time they loot your stuff and sell it and keep the proceeds and every time they keep you from some enterprise you just dreamed up because you are not properly licensed by people who never dreamed up anything ever...where the idea comes from that the police do just the opposite of what in fact they are actually doing: I really do not have the answer to that. The answer is there. I just don't have it. It pains me to admit it but there apparently are limits to my intelligence and genius. It pains me to admit.


  1. JJ! You've got to get back on the keyboard, man. I miss ya! You tickle my funny bone like no other. C'mon back!

  2. i am in facebook jail for a while. i was bad

  3. LoL! That shouldn't stop you here! Going to hunt ya down on FaceBook...

    Seriously. Looking for another story.